Posted by: Johan Normark | July 24, 2009

2012: How to spot a prophet’s Maya hoax – pyramids

A popular topic in the 2012 circus, and in pseudoscience in general, is that of pyramids. They are everywhere and therefore they must have the same origin (Atlantis or outer space are the dominant places of origin). Pyramids were not just burial chambers for royalty, they were either time machines, stargates, cosmic ray shelters, representations of the Earth, etc. We are usually told that archaeologists are stupid who cannot see the obvious connection between the pyramids spread around the globe in various forms and from different periods. As you can imagine, these people have not much knowledge of archaeology and as an effect of this they have even less knowledge of the history of archaeology. Yes, once upon a time, some archaeologists had diffusionist ideas and saw connections between pyramids, but that was a century ago. 

What do the pyramids have to do with 2012? This is an indirect connection. Underlying the assumptions about connections between ancient pyramid builders is the idea that the Maya Long Count calendar began in 3113/3114 BC, and that this records a historical event. What that event was is debated (usually the date when Atlantis sunk). The date is often connected to the early dynasties in Egypt and the spread of global pyramid builders (never mind that it took pyramids a couple of centuries to emerge in Egypt and a millennia and a half in Mesoamerica).

Of the many websites on this topic I choose Robert Bast’s Survive 2012. Rob has also a couple of blogs and a forum on 2012. As one might expect he begins with the Egyptian pyramids. This is the only area where we do have true pyramids but these only emerged in the 4th dynasty. Bast (and others) primarily talks about the Khufu (Cheops) pyramid at Giza as evidence of whatever they want. They discuss these pyramids as if they were largely created out of nothing, a sudden appearance. The Khufu pyramid was the result of a preceding tradition, beginning with predynastic and early dynastic mastabas (flat-roofed rectangular structures with outward sloping sides), Djoser’s step pyramid and then the true pyramids that began with Sneferu (whom Bast mentions in the passing).

What this shows is that pyramids emerged through a local Egyptian “tradition”. Djoser’s architect Imhotep placed smaller square mastabas on top of larger ones below, creating the sixth leveled step pyramid at Saqqara. The last pharaoh of the 3rd dynasty, Huni, began to build a step pyramid at Meidum. It was transformed into a “true” pyramidal shape by his successor, Sneferu, the first pharaoh of the 4th dynasty. At Dahshur, Sneferu first built the Bent pyramid which is a transitional pyramid form believed to have been the result of an engineering crisis encountered during its construction. The Red Pyramid at Dahshur is the world’s first true smooth-sided pyramid. There is therefore an ongoing experimentation of forms for several decades. This is a pattern we find everywhere in the world, there is always a local development of “pyramids”. Had there been an external source for them they would all look the same and should have emerged at the same time, not spread out in the chronological charts.

The Egyptian pyramids are also not seen as royal tombs (or not just as royal tombs). On the presence of empty burial chambers Bast says:  “These rooms have contained sarcophagi, but never with a body still within, which has prompted alternative researchers to look for other, non-burial purposes for these structures. Some sarcophagi were even found closed and sealed, yet still empty!…No mummy has ever been found in a pyramid in Egypt. Mummies have always come from mastabas or tombs in the Valley of the Kings.” The reason is simple: all pyramids were looted centuries ago, just as most of the tombs in the Valley of the Kings (except for king Tut). Whatever was in the burial chambers has been melted down or sold a long time ago. This is also believed by some Eqyptologists to be the reason why later pharaohs were buried in less visible places (it did not help since many tombs from the New Kingdom were already looted 3000 years ago).

Most other “pyramids” in the world have stairways and temples on the top (such as in the Maya area) and therefore do not resemble the Egyptian pyramids at all. It is only a general shape that is similar (construction techniques varies tremendously, which they would not have had had they been of the same origin). Pyramids are quite simple buildings with a broad base and a less broad top (not that difficult to come up with at different parts of the world). In order to reach the top you need a stairway, and voilá, you have made yourself a pyramid, witz, ziqqurat, prang, etc. In most mythologies, “pyramids” are also associated with mountains (Maya, Aztec, Hindu, Buddhism), not that hard to imagine. Just like in Egypt, the earliest monumental buildings in the Maya area were platform like. These rose in height at later periods and not uniformly throughout the Maya area.


Baksei Chamkrong at Angkor and Temple I at Tikal

Baksei Chamkrong at Angkor and Temple I at Tikal


 Even more common and more ancient than pyramids are in fact rectangular buildings. Most buildings have a rectangular form (not triangular or circular). Why does not “pseudoscientists” attribute this ancient global pattern to some aliens? The fact is that people liked geometric patterns in the past and they continue to do so in the present. It is probably part of a common ancestral cognitive capability rather than a common origin from a sunken continent or Marsians.



  1. Also, it was probably really interesting to get to see far away in those days. Building something tall would make that possible.
    Can’t you just imagine someone deciding to pattern it after a mountain? “We can spy on the neighbors, be safer, see game from a distance, entertain our friends, get fresh air, act like bigshots up there – let’s start piling up bricks and see how high up we can get.”
    That could happen independently in many places, you’re right.

  2. Honestly, you overly critical people you. Next you’ll say the rectangular longhouses of Neolithic Europe don’t prove that the Iroquese Indians are actually shipwrecked Europeans – when they clearly live in almost identical houses!

    But seriously, the whole insanity surrounding pyramids only show how important it is for prehistorians to show the often very obvious gradual development of great structures. They do not suddenly appear from the blue, but are always part of local traditions. Of course, the chance of ever convincing the Looney Squad is probably a gazillion to one…

  3. But I saw the documentary about the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and it clearly showed the extraterrestrial roots of pyramids and other ancient buildings.

    The Truth is Out There, Johan.

    (cue X-Files theme music)

  4. Sue: Most Maya temples are perhaps not primarily watch towers for enemies, especially those with a masonry temple on top, you would not be able to see what was behind the temple. Pyramids are seldom aligned towards neighbours that were many miles away and forested areas may have blocked enemies (there are few indications of large armies in the Maya area). There are also few traces of large scale fortifications in the Maya area.

  5. Åsa: I have constant battles with the Looney Squad on the 2012 forum ( Most recently there is one person who says that I am just interpreting archaeology from garbage, and informs me that there are ancient advanced cultures that did not litter. Interesting evidence for an ancient culture: it existed because there is no material trace of it… Looney Tunes…

    Why not join that forum and give them some new fresh ideas on the neolithic Europeans in Iroquese land! But you must relate it to 2012 or that archaeologists (or the illuminati) hides the evidence. Otherwise your credibility will sink like Wile E. Coyote in Looney Tunes.

  6. Ryan: All Indiana Jones movies are documentaries, they are based on true stories. I heard that the next one will focus on Parcela Escolar and that ancient landing strip for space crafts you and Dave mapped last season.

    The truth is definitely Out there (in the blue, in fantasy land).

  7. Don’t give up the secret before the big movie release Johan!

  8. Vi bygger skyddsrum för alla som vill överleva 2012. Denna gång är det inte pyramider som behöpvs för att överlev energin från Nibiru, nu måste det till en guld-kon både i toppen och i bottnen.

    Alla som deltar får en plats. Världsartister kommer som Bruce Springsteen och Bono…..Allt på Kinnekulle, som blir vårt heliga berg….Kolla in dagboken på

    Alla arbetare bor och äter gratis i Vara som ligger i närheten av skyddsrummen som heter Q1

    Välkommen Mikael

  9. The last comment was classified as spam but I believe it is a joke. Learn some Swedish before you read it.

  10. Ancients believed end by solar,they spokepictogram”pictionary” ADD the missing mirrorstones back to pyramid + in any language you can SEE the pyramids answer! Super volcanic solar reflectivity is only one thing in science + done only one way + works EVERY time,it cools earth + ONLY thing to stop a flare,aerosols aka VOLCANIC MIRROR..Proof? add the mirrors + look, you can SEE the VOLCANIC MIRROR of heaven. SO2 + OH + 3H2O -> H2SO4 (l) + HO2 youtube JUDI DONAHUE…+

    • Are you spam?

      • I am not spam …look at the video … both Giza + Easter Islands are giant ideograms of some extremely huger volcanology….

  11. They spoke visually,,,they created a message that would last centuries…readable visually once u understand….think pictionary category volcanology…..only real



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